Sunday, August 8, 2010


I am a sleeper.  It is what I do. Some people have expressed to me that they think it is necessary, but a waste of time. They feel guilty that they aren't up and using their for more productive things. I, however, have never felt that way, nor do I think I ever will. To me, sleeping is therapy. It is the best way to avoid the world's realities. And if you have ever seen me on a day when I have received less than the minimum 7-9 hours of required shut eye, I am intolerable. Even to myself. Naps require at least 2 hours. I have never been able to arouse myself graceful after only 20 minutes, even though studies say that is all you need. twenty minutes! Hardly worth it. I would have to set an alarm for a nap if that was the case.  And if I wake up with that groggy, pain behind the eyes feeling, going back to bed is a must because it doesn't go away all day.

So you can imagine what a shock it is to me that for the last 4 nights, I have barely slept. I have awoken promptly in the 3 o'clock hour only to battle the gut feeling that I will not be returning to slumber anytime soon. Some may say that I do not have insomnia. But let me tell you, 5-6 hours of sleep for me is not nearly enough. I am exhausted, but my body won't cooperate. Yesterday I managed to sleep for a couple hours late morning. When I woke up at noon, I felt incredible, but the day was almost over. And I had a sheet mark on my face that looked like a giant scar. Two hours into running errands, it was still on my face. Yes, 2 hours. My body is out of sync.
It is hard to concentrate on anything when I am this tired. My rate of production has been cut in half, like everything is happening in slow motion. The most baffling part is I don't know what is going on with me. Some say stress, but I think that is crazy. If I am stressed, I sleep to ignore it, which results in a repeating anxiety dream where I am back in the restaurant industry and the only person in the restaurant waiting tables. I always wake up feeling better because I realize that things could be far worse. This has always worked for me.

I had a friend suggest a super hot bath with ginger in it, and then straight to bed. I think she may be right. But I am going to hit some home remedies and turn it into a full spa evening. I think a manicure, and facial will be part of the process. I will drink some Sleepy Time tea and read my newest vampire series to try and settle my brain. I hope that does the trick, or it is long to be a long week.

1 comment:

Erika S said...

I love this, Cara, because I get it. I'm certain I'd win any sleep competition because the longer I sleep, the harder I sleep. In fact, just thinking about hitting the pillow is making my eyelids droopy. Love me some shuteye!